scientologie

Journalist Harmon Leon lives the stories he writes about, so we ask him to get a life in interesting places and report back to Asylum headquarters.I venture to the San Francisco Scientology center, filled with stacks of various books and DVDs -- all which are for sale. For some reason the Scientology center is manned by 14-year-old girls. I don't have an explanation for this. One of the 14-year-old girls introduces me to the E-Meter -- a religious artifact devised by sci-fi writer and Scientology founder L. Ron Hubbard. "You hold the two electrodes, and your mental state is checked on the E-Meter," she tells me as she hooks me up. "Recall a traumatic experience." I think about puppies and rainbows. The 14-year old girl points to the E-Meter. "Look! You can see the traumatic experience registering here. Our courses can help eliminate the pain caused by that memory. Now think of a pleasant experience." I imagine a nuclear holocaust. "The E-Meter records how you are content with that thought," she responds. I'm handed a 200-question personality test. The questions include: "Would you use corporal punishment on a child, age 10, if it refused to obey you?"; "Do people enjoy your company?"; "Are you in favour of class distinction?"; "Are you a slow eater?"To those questions I make sure to answer, "yes" (except the one about people enjoying my company). The other 195 questions I answer at random. When finished, the 14-year old girl leads me into a large official-looking office. A Scientology woman -- an important one, I presume -- sits behind a desk with a large box of Kleenex. (Maybe they expect me to cry?) She looks over my test. "This is the lowest personality test I've ever seen!" My personality ranks in an unacceptable state. Apparently, I am an unstable, withdrawn, irresponsible and depressed. But on the flip side, I'm intensely aggressive. "This section of the graph determines that you had a very traumatic childhood experience. What was that traumatic childhood experience?" I proceed with an unconventional answer, "My mother ... "According to the woman, I'm still holding that emotional baggage with me. "Also ... I was never allowed to watch television!" I make a sad face. She tells me they have courses which can help me deal with my childhood traumas and depression. Her eye contact becomes intense. "We can sign you up right now for the Introductory Class. The cost is $75. We accept cash or checks." She figures this unstable, aggressive guy will change his mind if she doesn't make the immediate hard sell. I pull out my wallet, put it back, then reassure I'll be back at nine o'clock tomorrow with my checkbook. She says to be sure to set aside time for studying. I'm pretty sure "studying" involves buying a lot of books.